[ linked from the continuations masterpost, this is where threads for various events or anything else will go! this post is specifically for SFW continuations. NSFW continuations are here! ]
The punishment of if people don't play. Mind whammies until you're done.
[The memory isn't as bad as some could be. Though it ends during the night without including the next day.] [But the feelings are strong. There is the panic, of course. The fear of discovery. He's trying so hard to hide the drawings he's made of the dragon, and then it sounds like he knows already. There is still fear, but honestly, this wasn't his father's scary calm. This was aggressive, but it isn't the amount of rage he expected.]
[He starts apologizing, feeling guilty, he should have just told him, but there is a relief that maybe, maybe this didn't have to be the nightmare scenarios he dreamt up.]
[Until his father laughs.]
[No, his father was just messing with him, and he was proud of his training, and because Hiccup is 'better,' he tells him all the thoughts he had kept to himself.]
[It feels as if the bottom of his stomach falls out of him as Stoick says everything he had suspected, everything he had feared was true.]
[How he knows the reason those feelings stopped is based on a lie. That these feelings are the truth of the matter. It leaves him almost numb to the pain that comes with the realization.]
[Lessens the blow of how eager his father looks to talk to him, and how its not true, but it doesn't negate the awkward.]
[The helmet is touching. If. Awkward. Because breastplate, but its something of his mother's and that still means a lot, and its still a lie, lie, lie-]
[Finally, the awkwardness is too much and with a weak excuse, he gets Stoick to leave and he sighs because it seems like they're awkward even when his dad wants to talk.]
[He looks at the helmet. He looks at the pictures. He repeats the words 'worst viking Berk's ever seen.']
[He sits down hard because he is going to need to make a choice. He knows he will. Because he can't be what they want. He can't be what his father wants.]
[He can't belong. He knows he will never belong, and he should just leave. Run away with Toothless.]
[He looks at the helmet and he sits down heavily because he knows he should leave, but the very thought makes his heart feel like its crumbling in his chest.]
....he's not a bad man. He's usually a very good man. A good chief. He cares so fiercely for his people and wants them safe.
Just.
It made him a bad father a lot of the time. He needed me to be something I wasn't, I caused problems, and got people hurt in my desperation, which got him upset, which made me more desperate, which caused more problems. He couldn't understand me. Most couldn't.
But he wanted to connect and I think that hurt worst of all. He wanted to, we wanted to, but it just didn't happen.
Not until....well, Toothless and Astrid and almost getting the whole village eaten by the Red Death because we couldn't listen and trust each other. Things did improve, but....
[He picks up the spyglass.] But scars don't go away easily.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
So, you agree that this is probably a 'trauma' game in disguise, huh?
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Okay. So. You probably want me to get started, huh?
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
You probably won't expect what you see. Most people don't.
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
[ For now, though, reaching for a memory...? ]
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
[The memory isn't as bad as some could be. Though it ends during the night without including the next day.]
[But the feelings are strong. There is the panic, of course. The fear of discovery. He's trying so hard to hide the drawings he's made of the dragon, and then it sounds like he knows already. There is still fear, but honestly, this wasn't his father's scary calm. This was aggressive, but it isn't the amount of rage he expected.]
[He starts apologizing, feeling guilty, he should have just told him, but there is a relief that maybe, maybe this didn't have to be the nightmare scenarios he dreamt up.]
[Until his father laughs.]
[No, his father was just messing with him, and he was proud of his training, and because Hiccup is 'better,' he tells him all the thoughts he had kept to himself.]
[It feels as if the bottom of his stomach falls out of him as Stoick says everything he had suspected, everything he had feared was true.]
[How he knows the reason those feelings stopped is based on a lie. That these feelings are the truth of the matter. It leaves him almost numb to the pain that comes with the realization.]
[Lessens the blow of how eager his father looks to talk to him, and how its not true, but it doesn't negate the awkward.]
[The helmet is touching. If. Awkward. Because breastplate, but its something of his mother's and that still means a lot, and its still a lie, lie, lie-]
[Finally, the awkwardness is too much and with a weak excuse, he gets Stoick to leave and he sighs because it seems like they're awkward even when his dad wants to talk.]
[He looks at the helmet. He looks at the pictures. He repeats the words 'worst viking Berk's ever seen.']
[He sits down hard because he is going to need to make a choice. He knows he will. Because he can't be what they want. He can't be what his father wants.]
[He can't belong. He knows he will never belong, and he should just leave. Run away with Toothless.]
[He looks at the helmet and he sits down heavily because he knows he should leave, but the very thought makes his heart feel like its crumbling in his chest.]
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Heh. Keep seeing parents in people's memories that make me think maybe I got the better end of the stick.
[ It's a pretty weak joke, but. It's also true. He's sorry, Rye. ]
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Just.
It made him a bad father a lot of the time. He needed me to be something I wasn't, I caused problems, and got people hurt in my desperation, which got him upset, which made me more desperate, which caused more problems. He couldn't understand me. Most couldn't.
But he wanted to connect and I think that hurt worst of all. He wanted to, we wanted to, but it just didn't happen.
Not until....well, Toothless and Astrid and almost getting the whole village eaten by the Red Death because we couldn't listen and trust each other. Things did improve, but....
[He picks up the spyglass.] But scars don't go away easily.
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Sounds like you've been thinking about this a lot.
[ And you've come out in a remarkably healthy place, all things considered. ]
No, they don't. They fade, but it takes a long time.
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
Its my dad. And for a while, I thought I had gotten everyone killed, and I'm relieved I didn't, but then its like...
There was everything before and after and its a lot. Things are better now. It shouldn't hurt this much still.
Re: + Rye, Rye's Sanctuary
'Shouldn't' doesn't really factor when it comes to feelings.